Life

Another one of those powerful four letter words I suppose. In any case life, right. Now is one of those times when I feel, out of it... I've had a great day (a party and then even more time with some friends); but I fell like I'm just floating through my days. Or rather, when something is happening I'm there but as soon as I'm by myself I can't do anything. I'm forced to... think. Horrible right? Me, thinking, no way! Hahah, okay laugh all you want. My point is that I keep on thinking about the impossible, about those dreams that everyone has of the perfect life that will never come true. Earlier today a friend and I were joking about how I was going to live in a mansion by a horse ranch (giant library included in that mansion) and she was going to have a cottage by the seaside. Then whenever we needed a change we'd just go visit the other person. Think about how impossible that actually is though. I feel as though I have no control over the future, or even the present sometimes. As for the past... there are so many things I wish I could change. I suppose all I can do is stand up and take charge of my life; but I'm having the hardest time making myself do that. It's so easy to just sit back and watch as life slips by... too easy...